Boston Globe: Thinking Literally
Sep 29th
“A nanny supervising a baby suspended in a wire cage...
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Sep 28th
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Sep 28th
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Sep 23rd
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Sep 22nd
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Sep 22nd
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Sep 22nd
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Sep 18th
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Elvis Costello - New Lace Sleeves
I knew it’s chronologically impossible, but it really does...
Sep 18th
I just had the ultimate "Berlin is a small village" experience. DHL, which had previously only delivered my packages to neighbors, decided to leave a large insured box at...wait for it...the florist. Two streets away. Now, I guess lifting 4kg weights at the gym has not prepared me to handle my own possessions because when I arrived to fetch it this a.m., I discovered it was just too heavy and awkward to carry a few hundred meters. Luckily, I saw the DHL truck around the corner. Here is a transcript of the weirdly personal conversation I had with my DHL guy, whom I have not seen since fall 2008, when I worked from home, and he bothered me incessantly about accepting packages for my "celebrity" neighbor.
Me: Hallo!
DHL guy: Hallo!
Me: I can't lift the package that DHL left at the Blumenladen.
DHL guy: Ah, Frau Doyle!
Me: Ja, will you help me?
DHL guy: But where is your husband?
Me: I have no husband!
DHL guy, thinking I was tricking him: But I have seen him before. The tall young man?
Me: We're not together anymore.
DHL guy: Then where is the other guy? (I assume he meant my former roommate)
Me: He lives in London now.
DHL guy, grudgingly: Fine I will deliver it. But you will have to wait til 3pm (It was 10).
(Long period of me convincing him to deliver it sooner)
(Doorbell rings)
DHL guy: Well then who is this second name on your buzzer?!?!
Me: My middle name!
DHL guy: Not your MANN?
Me: Nein!
DHL guy: (finally accepts this news, in total disbelief)
The saga finally ends, or so I thought....until "Fuck and Run" from Liz Phair's Exit in Guyville came on shuffle while I was biking to the office. Today seems to be full of relationship advice from unlikely sources. As my cousin just pointed out, "Maybe he left it at the florists to nudge your estranged Mann into buying you some flowers."
Me: Hallo!
DHL guy: Hallo!
Me: I can't lift the package that DHL left at the Blumenladen.
DHL guy: Ah, Frau Doyle!
Me: Ja, will you help me?
DHL guy: But where is your husband?
Me: I have no husband!
DHL guy, thinking I was tricking him: But I have seen him before. The tall young man?
Me: We're not together anymore.
DHL guy: Then where is the other guy? (I assume he meant my former roommate)
Me: He lives in London now.
DHL guy, grudgingly: Fine I will deliver it. But you will have to wait til 3pm (It was 10).
(Long period of me convincing him to deliver it sooner)
(Doorbell rings)
DHL guy: Well then who is this second name on your buzzer?!?!
Me: My middle name!
DHL guy: Not your MANN?
Me: Nein!
DHL guy: (finally accepts this news, in total disbelief)
The saga finally ends, or so I thought....until "Fuck and Run" from Liz Phair's Exit in Guyville came on shuffle while I was biking to the office. Today seems to be full of relationship advice from unlikely sources. As my cousin just pointed out, "Maybe he left it at the florists to nudge your estranged Mann into buying you some flowers."
Sep 16th
Sorry I’ve been lazy about le blog. I’ve been...
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